Examining the Natives.

I have been in Sydney for exactly 1 week. The natives are very friendly and accepting. But there are several things that I find humorous and interesting as an American in Australia.

1. The fashion here is very Euro-influenced. This means there is not much different in men’s and women’s clothes. The men wear very tight shirts and jeans. Guys wear uber-tight shirts and their collars are always popped. Sunglasses are just short of being skiing goggles.

2. Hairstyles. The dominant hair style for men is the Mull-Hawk (patent pending). This style is a Faux-Mohawk with a trendy little euro mullet patch on the neck. Its silly looking, but very popular.

3. Language. The Australian people as a whole are ver lazy. This laziness carries into their speech. They shorten, abbreviate and use acronyms as much as possible. For example:

breakfast = breaky
sunglasses = sunny’s
university = uni
biscuits/cookies = bicoo’s
poker = pokie
So on and so forth.

4. All men love Kylie Minogue (and similar music) and listen to it openly and proudly.

5. There is no underground/independent music scene in Australia. Mainstream pop rules all.

6. When you order a burger as an American you feel safe in ordering something you will enjoy. However, here all burgers come with beetroot and butter. You have to specify that you don’t want that and then get a funny look.

7. People love American sports apparel. Lot’s of baseball hats, jackets and tshirts (mostly Yankees). However, I did see a guy in a Nationals hat last night at the bus stop. I asked him where he got that hat, he told me from Footlocker because he liked the big “W” on it. Pretty cool.

8. They drive on the wrong side of the road. I still don’t know where to look when crossing the road. Oh yeah, and pedestrians NEVER have the right of way, they will run you over without thinking twice.

9. When a big brown guy comes up to them and speaks in a clear American accent, they get disoriented and take a few minutes to recover from the situation. Then they have to know everything about you and DC.

These things are making life fun and interesting; however I miss little things about home. I guess the thing I miss the most about home is a cold longneck of Miller Lite. See if you guys can ship me over a case.


The Redonkulous Linker said...

Does everyone wear 'roos shoes with the kangaroo pouch. http://www.zappos.com/n/es/d/722001412/page/1.html

subcontinental.giant said...

Good question. I will have to keep an eye out for that when I am doing more field work.

dumpoplex said...

Mull Hawk eh? You should incorporate it into your ginormous mane.

Are there brown guys in Australia? Other than you and Bilal?

rockstarjoe said...

It sounds like Aussie men are p-hags. You should be able to tag every girl on that continent within about 3 months. Send me your number so I can drunk-dial you and get a redonkulous phone bill.

The Redonkulous Linker said...

Have you been eaten by a dingo?

Jason said...

the real question is here how many koala bears have you molested..??

D-WO said...

F-the Miller Lites...what about Miller Lite girls?