Fade into Bolivia....

Saturday night my friends and I all got together and purchased the PPV Tyson v. McBride fight. It was great, just like every time when Tyson fights I was so happy. We were bbq'ing and drinking and singing merry songs. The undercards started and I was still excited, the fight started and they showed Ali and Tyson in the locker room and I sat closer to the edge of my seat. Then it was time ! First Scotty McDumperson came out with bagpipes playing and a leprechaun on his shoulder. Then Tyson came out in a t-shirt with no music....at that moment I knew something wasn't right. The fight begins and both fighters were dragging ass by the 2 round. An awful fight, and the frustrated ear-biting Tyson was back. First he tried to break Scotty McDumperson's left arm by tying it up and driving his elbow through his forearm. When he was called on that he gave him a solid head butt to open up a nice blood-gushing cut over the Clones Colossus' eye. The fight kept getting sloppier as did Tyson. Finally in the 6 McDumperson barreled over Tyson who fell on his ass and sat there asking the Ref for a hand ? What ! You can't ask the ref to help you get up in boxing match ! After that Tyson never answered the bell for the next round and his corner threw in the towel.

It was very hurtful to see Iron Mike quit. But then it happened. In the post fight interview Tyson said that he only did it to pay his bills and that he doesn't have it in him. My heart cried tears of blood ! A little piece of me died at that moment.

So what's next for Iron Mike ? The WWE ? Maybe he will go to Japan and join Sapp ? the Circus ? Who knows. I am going to try my hardest to erase his post-fight comments from my mind and he will always have a place in my heart as Iron Mike Tyson, the children eater, the only man who can Fuck people till they love him and the man who can knock Little Mac out with one punch. Even though you hurt me Mike, I still love you.


dumpoplex said...

This recap is right on. I think for people around our age, Tyson was a legendary monster. I remember being in elementary school and kids telling me about how they got to watch the fight with their dad and they watched tyson punch the guy in the head and his head exploded in like 4 seconds! We used to think that only some dude with a gun in his gloves could beat tyson.

Donkey Mcdonkerton said...

yeah I didnt even waste my time with this fight. I knew exactly what to expect. I said it the last time I watched him, I would never watch him fight again.